Hi. Again.

I have just spent about two hours researching cheap alternatives to printer ink cartridges, foundation art courses and beauty advent calendars and somewhere among that I had the urge that I haven't had in a really long time: the urge to just write. Now if you knew my life over the past few weeks you would think that totally insane as I have literally done nothing but write, art essays, English essays, personal statements etcetera etcetera. I don't do much for fun anymore. That sounds so ominous and depressing, I promise it's not that bad really!

Do you ever get the feeling that you don't really do anything for yourself anymore? I do art for my A level, likewise with textiles, likewise with English. As for maths I can't really say I ever did that for fun before - perhaps that's why it's the only subject I'm actually enjoying!

I miss this. I miss just writing for the hell of it to no one in particular. Ain't it funny how life can get in the way without you even realizing it?

I complain but I love it really. I enjoy school, I enjoy learning and most importantly, I chose this because it's what I want. I just love a moan - what can I say? I'm just very British!

It's a tough time but I'm a great believer in happy endings and I know I'll get through it and come out the other side smiling. Which, I suppose, is why I am here now. Because when I emerge smiling, I want to be writing for fun again. I want to be drawing, painting, sewing and just simply living again, because I want to, because I want to be happy and because why the hell shouldn't I?

So here I am, taking 20 minutes on my friday evening to listen to some terrible pop music and spill my thouhgts - because I want to. And you know what? Right now I'm smiling.

Now this post has been very me me me, so now I am going to stop being selfish and think about you, whoever you are and however you ended up here:

Keep going.
Keep trying.
No one can do this better than you.
You're crushing it.

Tag you're it - go make someone else feel better, repeat these words. And be happy. :)

Gabriella Hope


(P.s. I only just got that internet tags aren't just a load of questions people answer on a whim - it's things that other people challenge them to do! My word, I'm an idiot.)